I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize