So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
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