did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
