Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize