he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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