i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
