now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
