I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
