I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize