Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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