talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
