I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I think I sprained my soul last night
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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