Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
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