I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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