remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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