i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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