i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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