Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Randomize
