found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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