susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
