idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
