how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
