There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
