my mouth tastes like poor choices
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
