I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize