On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
