break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
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At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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