im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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