I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
