he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
