That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
