Tell her she can't have a vagina
love makes seman taste better
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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