Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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