Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
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Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
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He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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