all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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