Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
