We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
The adults are the big ones right?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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