So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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