In the future we'll all be gay
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
