At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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