i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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