So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
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