what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
