is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize
