Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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