ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
