a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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