Texts From Last Night

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  (613): View more from Ontario

  somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.

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  (613): somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex. http://tfl.nu/eqpv
  Replies (16) Good night (4073) Bad night (543)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.

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  (734): Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work. http://tfl.nu/ms2h
  Replies (12) Good night (527) Bad night (2081)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?

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  (304): remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night? http://tfl.nu/z8ke
  Replies (22) Good night (8674) Bad night (1061)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.

  (1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

  A Penis?

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  (610): Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me. (1-610): A Penis? http://tfl.nu/aerv
  Replies (50) Good night (3514) Bad night (555)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.

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  (952): he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does. http://tfl.nu/uw0a
  Replies (28) Good night (5157) Bad night (642)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty

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  (856): Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty http://tfl.nu/h187
  Replies (14) Good night (783) Bad night (3179)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.

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  (606): I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified. http://tfl.nu/k6t4
  Replies (15) Good night (5597) Bad night (1447)
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  (310): View more from California

  can your parents tell?

  (310): View more from California

  i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know

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  (310): can your parents tell? (310): i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know http://tfl.nu/rda5
  Replies (26) Good night (9561) Bad night (1467)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween

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  (317): having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween http://tfl.nu/sqve
  Replies (8) Good night (2999) Bad night (727)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette

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  (215): fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette http://tfl.nu/iod4
  Replies (6) Good night (1146) Bad night (451)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.

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  (412): You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you. http://tfl.nu/l1dm
  Replies (7) Good night (636) Bad night (1013)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.

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  (732): Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left. http://tfl.nu/846c
  Replies (3) Good night (1399) Bad night (374)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!

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  (973): Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone! http://tfl.nu/i9ym
  Replies (5) Good night (1229) Bad night (555)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.

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  (512): I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours. http://tfl.nu/179p
  Replies (8) Good night (455) Bad night (835)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...

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  (+44): Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer... http://tfl.nu/gvjp
  Replies (1) Good night (464) Bad night (328)

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