There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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