They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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