Just cropdusted the office
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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