READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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