I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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