Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Randomize